Excess on Their Hands
Synposis & Excerpts
A dramatic comedy about the male preference for younger women, and about how one older woman deals with that, also how people at midlife recover their path—played out with alter-egos.
The alter-egos include: For “Jessica” (the central female character)—“Blue,” her inner blues singer; “Val,” her inner Valkyrie; Miss Congeniality; Emily Dickinson; Mother; and Child. For “Jack” (the central male character)—“Thug”; his inner best self, Ralph Waldo Emerson; Father; and Child. In final scene, a Waiter.
From the play:
Excitement, excitement: Jessica has learned the man she has loved since the sandbox is now free and wants to see her. All her alter-egos are excited for her, all except Val, the Valkyrie, who reminds Jessica that Jack married her best friend and, who knows, maybe Jack was dumped? General argument ensues.
Jessica: QUIET! You know, some people have a still, small voice inside. One voice. Still, and small.
Val: How can a voice be still….?
Blue: And why be small? (To VAL) We agree?
Jessica: But: I have the Metropolitan Opera crossed with a goddam jazz session!
Mother: Dear, the profanity.
Emily Dickinson: It fits precisely the World within.
Jessica: Yes, but: It’s soooo discordant in here.
Comments
Sophy Burnham, executive director, Fund for New American Plays, The Kennedy Center: “I laughed so hard it hurt.”
Major regional theatre: “We gave this play very serious consideration.”
Martha Jacobs, director, Indianapolis: “Great idea, very funny.”
SYNOPSIS
A dramatic comedy—played out with alter-egos—about how one older woman deals with the male preference for younger women and, more deeply, how men and women alike reset their course in midlife.
When Jessica, a widow and Emily Dickinson scholar, learns at the play’s opening that Jack, whom she has secretly loved “since the sandbox,” is returning to Washington a free man (“Mona will not be accompanying me”), she is seized with strong but conflicting feelings. Should she, could she make her move? Counseling an emphatic Yes are her inner blues singer and inner child; Miss Congeniality; and, more equivocably, Emily Dickinson. But acting as damper, her inner Valkyrie, commander of her defense system, reminds her, seconded by her inner mother: “He married your best friend. Remember the bitter pain.” Also causing anxiety is the demand men make of women: beauty. Jessica is plain, and at middle age she’s becoming more so.
For his part Jack is in crisis: His beautiful wife of 30 years has left him and his career as a diplomat, once bright, has dimmed. Unlike his ambassador father, he is No. 2 to celebrity ambassadors; moreover, he feels inadequate dealing with a post-Cold War world where “for ten cents any thug can produce kaboom.” [N.B. this play was written before 9/11.] Unmoored and drinking, he desperately needs both a kind heart, which his best friend Jessica theoretically could provide (“Ah Jess, you’ve always understood me”), and rejuvenation, offered forcefully by his best self, Ralph Waldo Emerson. But, unmanned by Mona, he is also easy prey to the eternal male urge for “pulchitrude,” or as his inner thug puts it, citing “the coolest part of the Guy Prerogative”: “Senior guys can hook up with junior babes. Go for it.” He does—and devastates Jessica.
Act Two asks: Will Jessica unleash her fury? Will Jack recognize her inner beauty, as urged by Emerson? Moved by Jessica’s pain, the reclusive Emily Dickinson entreats Emerson to apply to his client’s Conscience (and makes her own move: “Plain maidens possess delights they desire to give away, Sir….”). At the climax, set in the Outpost Lounge, when scales finally fall from eyes—finally revealing both sets of alter-egos to each other (Waiter: “This is so opera!”)—what will they see?
Complicating this simple story line are the alter-egos, those powerful inner voices we edit before speaking. In fact, this interplay—of the controls editing, of the alter-egos battling among themselves—is the play. Ex.: Jessica’s elaborate toilette for Jack becomes a fight between Miss Congeniality who advises the subtle look and Blue who insists on the dramatic (“Cleavage: It separates the men from their minds and creates the illusion our waist is teeny”), juxtaposed with Jack’s quickie fix-up at Jessica’s door (“Hair combed?”).
A note: To hook a male audience, a comic touch is used and Jack’s needs are treated with sympathy (Miss Congeniality: “Jack’s life is in the toilet, remember that”). But the play is not-comic in asking: What is at work when a man looks at a middle-aged woman and an inner judge says No? More deeply, it poses a key question for men and women at midlife: What do those forces inside us say as we look at our lives and ask, What next, and why?
(The play’s title is from D.H. Lawrence: “Man has always his excess on his hands.”)
EXCERPTS
CHARACTERS
JESSICA—late 40s to mid-50s
Her alter-egos:
BLUE—the Blues Singer
VAL—the Valkyrie
MISS CONGENIALITY
EMILY DICKINSON
CHILD
MOTHER
JACK—same age as Jessica
His alter-egos:
THUG
RALPH WALDO EMERSON
CHILD
FATHER
THE LUSCIOUS YOUNG THING
THE WAITER
Casting note: Jessica and Blue, whom Jessica recognizes at the climax as her best self, preferably should be cast with different races.
SETTING
Washington, D.C.
TIME
Today
A priest, on being asked what years of listening to confessions had taught him: “First, people are much more unhappy than one thinks. And then, the fundamental fact: There is no such thing as a grown-up.” — Andre Malraux, Anti-Memoirs
EXCERPT I: Scene 1, Act One
Setting: Jessica’s Washington, D.C. home.
At rise: LIGHTS UP on BLUE.
BLUE
Free at last! Free at last! Thank God-a-mighty, he is free at last! Hallelujah! Ohhh baby, this is the best news we’ve had in a long, long time.
LIGHTS UP on JESSICA.
JESSICA
Hallelujah indeed….
BLUE
Oh Jessie, I thought this day would never come—never!
JESSICA
Neither did I.
BLUE
I’ve been singing the blues for you forever, but freedom songs? Not til now. Finally: The man we have loved since the sandbox—
Enter the CHILD, running.
CHILD
I love you, Jack! Love you-love you-love-you, always and forever, Jack!
BLUE
Yes, that man is free! Amen!
CHILD
Amen!
JESSICA
Amen. Ah: His voice….
BLUE
Yeah, he’s got a nice voice.
CHILD
I like his laugh.
JESSICA
He’s always had a certain something. But: such sad eyes. In between there are worlds…..
BLUE
—and we are gonna explore ‘em. Yeah!
JESSICA
Oh God, how do I look? Do I look O.K.? Do you think he’ll like me like this?
BLUE
Right now, girl, you glow.
JESSICA
I could lose ten, fifteen—twenty pounds.
BLUE
Too late. He’s here already—for you.
JESSICA
Oh, Blue: Can we believe it?
BLUE
Hard to believe, awful hard to believe. Read that fax again.
JESSICA
Yes; where is that life-altering document?
CHILD
In your hand, all mashed up.
JESSICA
Ohhhh, I wanted to frame it….
BLUE
You passionate thing, you. Now, read it. I want to memorize every word.
JESSICA
“Dear Jessie—“
BLUE
Excellent. “Jessie”’s cozier than Jessica.
JESSICA
“Am returning to Washington for reassignment.”
BLUE
Star of the State Department will be in and out fast, so we gotta move. Why? Next part’s my fave.
JESSICA
“Mona will not be accompanying me.”
BLUE
Mona—is—gone! Hallelujah!
CHILD
Wave ‘bye-bye, Mona.
JESSICA
Yes. Sayonara, Mona.
BLUE
Mona’s nothing but a memory.
JESSICA
But memory, and heartache, give rise to the blues. He must, you know, hurt so bad.
BLUE
Yeah he’ll be hurting—and you can kiss his wounds. Mona’s been two-timing him from the start. Like he’s been confiding in you from the start. You know all the lyrics to that man’s blues. And now, he’s dumped her—at last. Freed himself up—for you. Like the man says….
JESSICA
Yes. “Can’t wait to see you.”
BLUE
We can’t wait to see you either, Jack! And in closing….
JESSICA
“I arrive on the 21st.”
BLUE
To-day.
JESSICA
“Call me at the house. Best, Jack.”
BLUE
Now to bump “Best” to “Love,” go from faxing to—
JESSICA
Blue! Not in front of the Child.
CHILD
I know what it means.
BLUE
Jessica: You know you want it.
JESSICA
Well, I’d phrase it differently.
BLUE
Honey, we don’t worry about phrasing between us. It’s primal in here—primal.
JESSICA
All right: I want “it.”
THEY scream and shout.
JESSICA
But mostly: I want him. I want Us. I do, I do, I do.
BLUE
Do we ever. We’ve loved that man through so much: a couple of insignificant significant others, a boring marriage—
JESSICA
Now, Sam was nice.
BLUE
Sam, rest his soul, had no color. We yawned at our own wedding. Sam was a substitute for Jack. So were those two PhDs of yours. You wore me out, singing your blues.
BLUE
The second was overkill.
BLUE
And that book of yours.
JESSICA
My prize-winning book.
BLUE
“The Dashes of Emily Dickinson: The”—what?
JESSICA
“The Worlds Unexpressed.” Emily was so precise that, given her power of expression, if she could not express something—
BLUE
Emily didn’t get out of the house. If she had, those dashes would’ve been expressed.
Enter EMILY DICKINSON, carrying a cake.
JESSICA
Emily….?!
EMILY DICKINSON
To celebrate your Capital News, I thought I would—dash over.
JESSICA
You’ve emerged on my behalf?
EMILY DICKINSON
No man stopped for me. This is—dash—Event.
BLUE
(To EMILY) So, you’ve been singing the blues too?
EMILY DICKINSON
In my own key.
BLUE
(To EMILY) Glad to meet you at last. It takes an “event” to bring us together.
EMILY DICKINSON
It does. Cake all around?
JESSICA
The famous black cake.
CHILD
Yum!
BLUE
Uh, Jack likes ‘em skinny, Jess.
JESSICA
Make that thirty pounds.
BLUE
We’ll wear our strategic outfit, designed for a “spectrum of sizes.”
EMILY DICKINSON
I labored for nothing?
BLUE
That’s guilt, Miss Em. Don’t do that.
CHILD
Jack’s put on weight, you know.
BLUE
Men can, we can’t.
CHILD
But why?
BLUE
Because.
CHILD
But why?
BLUE
Because that’s the way it is, Child!
JESSICA
Let’s not argue, please?
CHILD
I WANT SOME CAKE!
EMILY DICKINSON
Just the merest suggestion of a sliver….?
CHILD
(To BLUE) You know you want “it,” Blue.
BLUE
All right. Cake us, Miss Em, with the merest. Then we fix this gal up.
LAUGHTER. LIGHTS UP on VAL, the Valkyrie.
JESSICA
Oh dear…. Hello, Val. I wondered when you’d come.
BLUE
She’s come for the cake.
VAL
I’ve come to remind Jessica: He married your best friend. Never forget that.
BLUE
What took you so long, Val?
VAL
I had to suit up. And so does Jessica. He married your best friend.
JESSICA
That was thirty years ago.
VAL
PAIN NEVER DIES! Remember the pain—the bitter pain.
CHILD
Mona was not my best friend, you know.
JESSICA
She was a circumstantial friend, she lived next door.
VAL
John had taken an oath to you.
JESSICA
We were only “going steady.”
CHILD
Still: Jack—dumped me for Mona, when she dumped Steve. And Jack dumped me with a letter, the coward. Coward-coward-coward.
JESSICA
O.K., O.K., O.K., I remember the pain.
VAL
Say it with feeling. Mit passion.
JESSICA
All right! I remember it: the bitter, bitter pain.
VAL
Wunderbar.
JESSICA
But: I also remember—
VAL
—how you three have been “friends” ever since, ja. It was Betrayal! They betrayed you.
Enter MOTHER.
MOTHER
—and friends don’t do those sorts of things.
JESSICA
Oh hello, Mother.
CHILD
(Running to MOTHER) Mommy, Mommy, I hurt….
MOTHER
I tried to protect you, but Mona was a beauty, and while you have your own kind of beauty, dear, you were no Miss America. So Jack, being male, naturally gravitated toward beauty—
ALL
Naturally.
MOTHER
—and you were much too nice about the whole business.
JESSICA
Which I learned from you, Mother: being nice.
BLUE
(To EMILY) This is where it gets complicated, Miss Em.
EMILY DICKSINSON
Yes, Civility has—Penances.
VAL
The biggest penance being Jessica serving as shoulder to Jack’s Sturm und Drang with Mona.
JESSICA
Say what you will but: Where would we be without civility?
BLUE
Yeah, we’d be in—(To VAL) Gutter—what?
VAL
Götterdammerung!
BLUE
You got it.
VAL
JA!
JESSICA
(To VAL) I cannot believe you inhabit me, I just can not.
VAL
Believe it. And believe this: You are very, very angry at Jack, not least because Mona never loved him—
MISS CONGENIALITY (offstage)
Yoo-hoo, I inhabit you too! ‘Scuse me, ‘scuse me, I’m coming….!
VAL
Ach, the Southern belle.
JESSICA
Everybody, be nice to her.
VAL
You’re too protective of her.
JESSICA
Naturally: She’s my best self.
VAL
God help you.
BLUE
I thought I was your best self….
CHILD
I really like her, she’s so nice.
BLUE
Too nice. My biggest fans, Jessica, are people who are too nice.
EMILY DICKINSON
Will this become—violent?
VAL
How else can Truth be forged?
Enter MISS CONGENIALITY.
MISS CONGENALITY
Hello everybody, sorry to be late. E-e-e-e, Jessie, I’m so-o-o-o happy for you!
VAL
Isn’t punctuality a major symptom of your disease?
JESSICA
Val—
MISS CONGENIALITY
I was doing my thank-you notes.
VAL
“Dear Sister Contestant: Thanks for being a loser too.”
BLUE
You’re no prize-winner. Not with that attitude, and the costume.
MISS CONGENIALITY
We of the pageant don’t speak of winners and losers.
VAL
But you think it.
MISS CONGENIALITY
Naturally the crown goes to beauty, but congeniality is honored too. By society.
VAL
After four runners-up: for Beauty.
JESSICA
—Liposuction, I need lots of liposuction—
MISS CONGENIALTY
But—but I was elected by my sisters….
VAL
Who’re all praying for the crown and not the sash!
JESSICA
Thank you for making her cry, Val.
MISS CONGENIALITY
…but thanks for your input….
VAL
You should develop muscle, Miss.
BLUE
And you should develop manners, Sister.
VAL
Manners are the problem! And we are not sisters.
BLUE
Oh yes we are, Sister.
JESSICA
QUIET! You know, some people have a still, small voice inside. One voice. Still, and small.
VAL
How can a voice be still?
BLUE
And why be small? (To VAL) We agree?
JESSICA
But: I have the Metropolitan Opera crossed with a goddam jazz session!
MOTHER
Dear, the profanity.
EMILY DICKSINON
It fits precisely the world within….
JESSICA
Yes, it’s so discordant in here. No consistency of style or message, alliances shifting—
VAL
That’s your job: exercising consistency. Control.
JESSICA
It is, but: Sometimes I think you’ll all drive me stark raving mad!
EMILY DICKINSON
It has been ever such.
MOTHER
It is a bit excessive.
MISS CONGENIALITY
Honey, I have concealer for that blotchiness. I can share all kinds of beauty tricks.
VAL
The biggest “trick” being charm—
JESSICA
Aw please! I just got the most cheering news. The man I have loved—
CHILD
—since the sandbox—
JESSICA
—is free. He’s freed himself—to come to me.
VAL
On that point: Well, I hate to be a wet blanket…..
BLUE and MISS CONGENIALITY
Oh sure.
CHILD
Yeah right.
EMILY DICKINSON
(Beat) Ha.
VAL
Am I the only one to note a certain imprecision? In his fax, John says: “Mona will not be accompanying me.” You all interpret that to mean he left her. But: Given the rate Mona has bestowed her charms on other men, what if she left him?
EMILY DICKINSON
There is ambiguity on that point.
VAL
Like the man.
JESSICA
But…he wants to see me and I want to see him…..
MOTHER
He wants to use you.
VAL
He needs your shoulder—as he has for twenty-nine-and-a-half years.
BLUE
Well, the shoulder’s connected to the neckbone—
JESSICA
But, I’ve been so lonely!
BLUE
Amen to that!
[SCENE CONTINUES]
EXCERPT II: Scene Two, Act One—introducing Jack’s alter-egos
Setting: Jack’s Washington, D.C. home.
At rise: LIGHTS UP on THUG.
THUG
Free at last, free at last! Thank God-a-mighty, Jack-man, you are free at last! Hoo-ee!
LIGHTS UP on JACK. Both JACK and THUG are drinking.
JACK
Yeah: I’m free—and miserable.
THUG
Oh no, guy, you are so happy.
JACK
Oh no I am so miserable—and I’m drinking in the morning. Mona is gone. My career is going. I want Mona and I want my brilliant career back….
THUG
If you hadn’t jammed my Machiavellian input, your career would be aces. But now that the career’s over, time for my forte: women. And Mona? You do not want Mona.
LIGHTS UP on CHILD, who is face down on the floor, sniveling.
CHILD
Mona…. Mona…. I want my MONA-A-A-A-A…..
THUG
Can it, little guy.
JACK
Play it, child, play it. And while you’re at it, could you wail about my career too?
CHILD
Don’t want to, your career was nothing but homework and I hate homework. MO-NA….
THUG
Christ! Jack, look at it this way: Mona did you a favor. She gave you freedom. Whether you wanted it or not. And what do guys do with freedom? They exercise their Guy Prerogative and get them some JOY.
CHILD
What’s a “per-ga-gative”?
THUG
Pre-roga-tive. Meaning all rights appertaining to being a guy. …. And the coolest part of the Guy Prerogative? Senior guys can hook up with junior babes. I’m thinking: intern. When you go into the Department tomorrow, check out the new crop.
JACK
I want Mona….
THUG
Jesus! We’re gonna forget that bitch.
JACK
Mona’s not a bitch.
THUG
Mona’s the bitch of all time, because: She betrayed you, Jack—double. One: She runs off with Mister Ambassador, your own Chief of Mission. Two: Mister Ambassador is not even a career professional, he’s Mister Celebrity Appointee, a former TV star.
JACK
—whose conceptual framework was his former series, for God’s sakes.
THUG
You should be erupting in Othello-type rage. Get out of the dumps and advance to rage.
JACK
But, is rage truly an advance?
CHILD
I WANNA DO RAGE, I WANNA ERUPT!
JACK
I am losing my mind….
[THUG redoubles his efforts to steer Jack to the Guy Prerogative. Enter FATHER.]
FATHER
The thing for the career at this critical juncture is the most sober and diligent performance of your duties. To make ambassadorial rank, as I did, as did your grandfather, you must request the most demanding assignments and acquit yourself, and not, I repeat, not indulge in hijinks.
JACK
Gee, Dad, I would hope for sympathy from you.
FATHER
Son, you can’t wallow in the emotions, not in the [Foreign] Service.
JACK
Father: My career in the Service is, shall we say, stalled.
FATHER
This Mona thing is minor, it’ll blow over. Spouse ran off with the entertainment. The career people will see that.
JACK
Again, Father: It’s the career people who are minor now. If we political officers can’t read the politics of our day….
FATHER
It’s your reading of today’s politics that accounts for the stall in the career. Your recent tours have been, shall we say, lackluster, your cables lack cogency.
JACK
That’s because the world’s a hell of a lot less cogent than the Soviet-American world of your day. Your world was black-and-white—
FATHER
—with the potential for a huge atomic bang.
JACK
And mine’s a spectrum of grays with the potential for multiple flashes. Any thug can take any bottle and for ten cents American he can produce—
THUG
Kaboom-boom-boom.
JACK
Which is why I am resigning. I am at sea in this world, completely and utterly at sea.
FATHER
But periods of transition present great opportunities—
JACK
To him who can point the way. I can’t.
FATHER
Well, if you think resorting to carnality will help—
THUG
It helped you, Pop.
JACK
It helped you, Father. You fished off the sacred company pier.
[FATHER is silent as THUG recounts dalliances. Enter RALPH WALDO EMERSON.]
THUG
Oh God, the Poet-Philosopher. Hey everybody, it’s Ralph Waldo.
JACK
Hello, Emerson. I expected you might come, though it’s been a long time.
EMERSON
Yes, since you left off our communion. But your Soul is in such a jangle that my Soul, though it rest now in the empyrean, was disturbed.
THUG
Mister “Over-Soul.”
EMERSON
(To THUG) Lounging Lizard!
FATHER
Admirably cogent.
EMERSON
Is this our full complement? Will no other personages be in attendance?
JACK
This is it: the full—deck.
EMERSON
What moral vigor will be needed….
JACK
Emerson, if you’ve come to “enkindle me, I’m afraid it’s useless.
EMERSON
It may seem so, yes…. Many an extraordinary young man has failed to ripen, has he not? He has failed to ripen and, at midpoint in his journey, he finds himself on the stair….
JACK is silent.
EMERSON
All things that he reckoned settled—nations, religions, climates—his career and his marriage union—they shudder, leave their foundations, and swim before his eyes…
JACK
Yes: everything swims….
EMERSON
Ghostlike, he glides through nature and—he does not know his place—
THUG
Point made, Ralph Waldo—very poetic.
EMERSON
(To THUG) —and he looks back over his experience and he sees: The Slime of Error!
CHILD
That’s two!
THUG
(To CHILD) Whose side are you on?
CHILD
Whoever throws the punch. I love fights.
EMERSON
(To CHILD) My domesticated sunbeam, come here.
THUG
Your what? (To CHILD) Hey, come back here!
[Emerson tries to “enkindle” Jack about the world, his book, and the “estimable” Jessica.]
EMERSON
Use your despair to augment your truth. Because to make a new estimate, especially in these wildly misshapen times: That is elevation. I know it!
THUG
What elevates you is a drag to others. Now, speaking of shapes….
EMERSON
It’s disgraceful to fly to other forms for ratification.
THUG
Oh yeah? May I quote you? “A beautiful face sets twenty hearts in palpitation.”
EMERSON
(Beat) A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
[SCENE CONTINUES]
EXCERPT III: From Scene 3, Act One—Jack and Jessica meet.
Setting: Jessica’s home. Here, Jack and his alter-egos arrive at Jessica’s door. [NOTE: The two sets of alter-egos engage only their own set, they do not cross-engage until the climax—when scales have fallen from all eyes.]
JESSICA
Jack…. Well: Here you are.
JESSICA’S CHILD
Jackie-e-e-!
BLUE and MISS CONGENIALITY
Finally: The Moment.
MOTHER and VAL
…and he’s drunk?
JACK
Yes; here I am….
EMERSON
Wretched….
FATHER
…and in very bad form.
THUG
Don’t fall.
An awkward pause.
JESSICA’S CHILD
Hi Jack, hi-jack a plane! (Giggles)
JACK’S CHILD
Heyyy, Jessie! (Laughs)
JESSICA moves to give JACK a hug. JACK hugs her back.
BLUE and MISS CONGENIALITY
Contact: mm-mm-mm….
THUG
Uh-uh-uh, watch the contact.
JESSICA
Well, don’t just stand there. Get yourself in here.
JACK, THUG, and CHILD enter and plop in chairs. FATHER and EMERSON stand apart.
FATHER and MOTHER
Some diplomat!
BLUE
He’s hurting. He’s a diplomat, he knows how to hide stuff. He’s hurting and he’s showing his hurt to you, Jess. We can work with this.
MISS CONGENIALITY
Yeah. Offer him something, ‘cause poor baby sure doesn’t look good.
JESSICA
Jack, you look so—so….
JESSICA’S CHILD
He looks sorta funny.
VAL and MOTHER
He looks dead drunk.
MISS CONGENIALITY
Baby looks so tired.
JESSICA
You look so—dead—tired.
THUG
Hmm, thought we looked pretty good, considering….
JESSICA
Can I get you something to drink?
ALL OF JESSICA’S ALTER-EGOS
Coffee?
JACK’S CHILD
Jessie stocks my Wild Turkey, I WANT WILD TURKEY!
THUG
Love that buzz.
EMERSON
A sound Soul would be tipsy with water!
JACK
I recall you stock Wild Turkey….
BLUE
Triple espresso!
MOTHER
Dear, have you considered what life would be like with an alcoholic?
MISS CONGENIALITY
Try CPR, that would be fun.
VAL
So would a cattle prod! Aren’t we thrilled we went to so much trouble with our toilette?
JESSICA
Jack: You really could use some coffee. I’ll be just a minute….
THUG
Coffee means we’re bombing. (Sniffing in direction of VAL and MOTHER) Something is out there, guys. Attenzione….
[After more misfires, with Jessica & Co. trying to steer conversation toward the personal and Jack & Co. trying to keep it neutral, Jack recovers himself by asking about Jessica’s book. Val: “Yes, but has he read our book?” Jack has not, which leads him to reveal that he’d like to write a book himself, also that’s he considering resigning.]
JACK
So, what do you think? About my resigning….?
JESSICA
I think you should.
JACK
Do you?
JESSICA
As your Emerson said, “Adherence to forms that are dead to us scatters our force.”
EMERSON
Peerless woman!
JESSICA
Spend your force on the book that lies within you, Jack. A book about these times, about which, despite your despair, you care. At the end of the day, that is what you want: your book.
BLUE and MISS CONGENIALITY
And us, we hope.
VAL
He wants Mona.
JACK
Ah Jess: You have always, always understood what goes on with me….
THUG
Why do I try, why do I try?
JESSICA’S CHILD
But you’ve never understood what goes on with me—never.
BLUE
Yeah, Jack: And we understand about Mona.
VAL
Ja: Mona does not love you—and she never did!
JESSICA
Jack: I’ve always understood about Mona….
JACK’S CHILD
(Starts to cry) MO-NA….!
THUG
We killed that woman off!
JACK
Ah, Mona….
EMILY DICKINSON
What lies behind that “Ah”?
VAL
That’s what we need to find out—without bogging down in sympathy.
JESSICA
What lies behind that “Ah,” Jack….?
THUG
Ah nothing, guy.
FATHER
Protect your back channel, John.
MISS CONGENIALITY
I know: “Mona has other plans….?”
JESSICA
Mona’s not accompanying you, because she has other plans….?
THUG
You know, pal, Jessica’s not asking after Mona’s welfare—
JACK’S CHILD
MONA RAN OFF WITH TONY-Y-Y-Y! (Bawls)
JACK
Yes, Mona has other plans…. Actually….: Mona ran off with my ambassador.
JESSICA’s ALTER-EGOS cheer. THUG throws up his hands. BLUE cuts off cheering.
BLUE
Don’t look too happy, hon.
MOTHER
Sounds like the Mona I knew.
FATHER
Petulance in a man is—unmanly, John.
JACK
Sorry for the petulance, Jess.
MISS CONGENIALITY
Don’t apologize, sweetie!
JESSICA
Don’t apologize, Jack. (Beat, to alter-egos) Now what?
BLUE
Jump him!
MISS CONGENIALITY
Yeah!
VAL
NOT til we find out about Mona!
BLUE and MISS CONGENIALITY
WE DON’T CARE ABOUT MONA!
VAL, MOTHER, and EMILY DICKINSON
We’d better care about Mona.
[SCENE CONTINUES]